We’ve been here almost a year.
We’ve made friends.
The time goes so fast overseas that we’ve already said goodbye to friends we made at first. Just this week #1 and #3 found some girls from France whose company they enjoy. They’ve been in Russia for ten years and guess what, this Saturday, they’re leaving----for good!
Is it better to have loved and lost than never loved at all? I’m starting to wonder.
At the same time, we’re contemplating visits home and I dread the thought of reunions that turn into departures. I can see why some ex-pats just keep to their own circles. It’s hard to open up again and love somebody for a brief amount of time. Some of the people here who were strangers at first will be lifelong friends now, but no matter what---eventually one of us will leave.
It’s like a staring contest. Who’s going to blink first?
I could be cranky because I have mild food poisoning and had to cancel afternoon tea today with my friend from Trinidad who is going home for the summer next week. Our compound is like a ghost town. All the corporate ex-pats have gone home. Unless I want to dish out $7K, I’m staying put for now.
One of my friends said it best. “Once you’ve lived abroad,” she said, “it’s like you’re ruined for America.” I get that now. My kids’ friends are from far-off countries like Vietnam, Trinidad, England, France, Singapore, Australia, China, and of course, Russia.
How can they ever go back to a farm community where everybody’s lived in the same house their grandparents built? How can I forget the interesting customs and souvenirs? How will I adjust to not kissing people’s cheeks in greeting? How will you respond when I greet you in Russian? How will we connect? I’m sorry this isn’t funny like usual, but funny isn’t always part of my day. It’s July and everyone is going home
The weather’s fine.
The kids are fine.
But time is passing.
I see how that can be difficult for you. A friend of mines sister has been in Germany for 3 years and they're headed back to Michigan this July for good. Well - she says in her own blog that she can see now that she'll never be stationary again. Every time they've come back to visit she's felt like a foreigner to the US and feels like traveling is more comfortable now. I guess the only thing I can say is enjoy the small amount of time you have with those people, you never know when your paths might cross again!
ReplyDeleteLove your thoughts - thanks for sharing them. I can only speak for myself in this small farming community but your brief visit home will add color and interest for me. Its a return (and a departure) sure, but it is still all forward movement. I don't want to hold you down or hold you back or even hold on to how everything used to be. I just want a moment, in the here and now, to enjoy who you are TODAY. And I will GLADLY accept a kiss on the cheek! Love you sister-friend.
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