Ready, Aim, Launch!

When I was 17, I had a set of wedding rings in the bottom drawer of my dresser. My husband and I had saved up and purchased them out of the bargain corner in the newspaper. That Spring, I graduated second in my class and commuted to college in the Fall. It was an uphill climb for me. I paid my own way, filled out my forms, and bought my own books. I had to drive the 40 mile round trip route five days a week. After school I worked to pay for my car, gas, and insurance. I took a grueling 21 credits per semester and maintained a perfect GPA. After my third semester, I quit to get married. Nine months and five days after our wedding, I delivered a baby girl. Three more kids followed by the time I was 25. I went back several years later part time, but then we moved to Russia and I had to leave it again. I only need 50 credits to finish and I still have a 4.0.

I had a teacher in high school who I suspect saw my potential. He said to me once, shortly after graduation, "You have to be great. You owe it to us. All of us." At the time I thought that his expectations were not appropriate. That he didn't get to own a part of my success any more than he owned my car or my books.

Exactly 20 years later, my 17 year-old daughter moved to college. A large 55,000 student state university. She'd never met her roommates before that first awkward day. She has swam in the Atlantic, Pacific, and Mediterranean. She's been to Europe without us, and on trains, planes, and automobiles by herself. She doesn't have a boyfriend. She knows what she wants to do and how to get there. She's focused and driven and anyone with eyes can see it.



Bringing her to school was entirely more emotional than I thought it would be. I kept trying not to project, but I realized as I walked the poorly lit institutional halls that she is my dream in motion. She didn't ask for this and certainly reminds me that she didn't ask to be born when I was 20. But all the same, I feel feelings. I get it now. I understand my teacher's sentiments because I can see greatness, too.

Beyond generous gifts from friends and family (thank you) who helped pay for dorm supplies and immediate costs, we are paying for most of her education. Because I think it's important. I sometimes ask myself what I would have been if I had married instead at 22, finished my education, and waited to have kids. Yes, I would have been older. I may have even had a successful career start under my belt.

But the fact is that I am a 37 year-old mother of a college student. I am proud, humbled, and grateful that each generation gets a fresh start.